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SITTING AT THE PLAYGROUND OF MY MIND; TRYING TO SET ASIDE A MOMENT FOR THE FORBIDDEN PLEASURES OF THOUGHT, I CANNOT COPE WITH THE STRUGGLE TO THINK OF YOU. IT IS ALL AS IT ONCE WAS; BUT NOT AT ALL AS IT IS YET TO BE, “ALMOST” HAS NEVER BEEN CLOSE ENOUGH TO GRASP.
I CANNOT HELP MYSELF BUT TO BE ALIGNED WRONG; I’VE ALWAYS BEEN PART OF NOWHERE, STUCK OUT OF PLACE AND TIME. MY MIND HAS NOT ENJOYED THIS BLAND JOURNEY; MY HEART HAS NEVER BEEN SETTLED, MY SOUL ... NON-EXSISTANT.

Versus

I stand alone on a desolate battlefield; awaiting the called charge, it will end all suffrage of pain. The time and call never reach me. The grass glows gently beneath the crescent moon filled sky; from which the nights endless sweet breath blows softly on my face, I am blinded by the glazing after effect. Attempting to lay and rest; my body is weary , awake am I for the duration of the evening. Morning swoops in later than expected; the dulling sun eludes the clouds, I ready myself for battle. The enemy - my shadow; its reflection, the ultimate adversary. The battle for control has begun; and still in lifes wonder, my mind awaits the called charge.

Of a Friend, Shadows

Shadows from a stranger; come in from the nights chill, step towards the candlelight to show thyself. Be not afraid of my maud kindness; cast out your delusions, put aside your fear and come nigh. Bring to me the smile of a child hidden within the beauty of woman; still somewhat encased, in the stranger I once knew. Show me thy face; let me look upon your splendor, let its freedom touch upon my heart once more. Indeed it has missed your embrace; and I, its love.

Abandon

Condemned am I; to this rotting corpse of meat and bone and within it, a shallow beating heart. As if; just another cursed wreckage, tossed aside to waste away into nothingness. All is lost with me, as perversions of happiness fall short of mind. Nothing is as it seems to be and I; myself, a huge part of that nothing. Thoughtless words of bitter wisdom echo within my head. Although not deafened by the cursed laughter of them, I am blinded in the dim lit presence of my own image.

Essence of a Dreamer

Darkened urges boil deep beneath my skin, tearing and scratching towards freedom. They have consumed me for the longest of time; they have attacked my utter most being, and live off my many undiluted fears. The leveling off of my minds power and the heightening of odd daze sets in; confusion is the souls provider, for which there is an abundance. The light of truth dims low; being forced out by disturbing fantasies, never less disturbed than once before. Death and destruction fill in the blanks of what is left of my humanity; it picks off the tidbits of sanity that cling hard for lifes struggle. Shadows of ring tossing puppets; labyrinths of thought crumbling to dust, I slowly die in a sleepless dream.